Beauty in the Broken

Never knew there was beauty to be had in the brokenness of a wounded soul. But there is. With God there is. With the love and absolute faithfulness of Christ the King there is beauty to be had in the brokenhearted.

When I chose to believe in and follow Christ ten years ago I never knew what my walk with Him would look like, feel like. Guess I thought life would be better, that I wouldn't hurt so badly anymore, that He would protect me from any harm and suffering. But if I had payed attention to Paul's epistles I would've seen that suffering would surely accompany me on my journey of faith. And this is exactly what I've endured...suffering, brokenness, an open, wounded, aching heart.

Did God let me down, has He forgotten me? Absolutely not. In fact I'm learning, here in the valley of Trouble, He is right here with me, walking this walk, holding my hand and loving me like never before.

So there is Beauty in the Broken. Christ is the Beautiful Face shining forth out of my oh so broken life. I am broken for Him, my suffering is for the sake of His saints.

I cry out "I am my Beloved's and He is mine." Shine forth O Light of the World!

The Unseen Child: Grieving the loss of a miscarried babe

The promises we make
and break
all in the same breath
I'm scared to death
and he falls gently to the ground
without a sound
and I cannot see
why He means it to be
this way...

So stay
or go
I don't know
if I'll make it through
the blueness
of this night

The fight takes all I have and will be
I can't fight it anymore

by Hilary D'Elia

Judah

I miss the possibility of you here
You are better off in His Hands

O how the tears fall softly
Down my face and I
Can't keep up with
Wiping them away

Can't we meet just once
And look each other in the eyes
Would you meet me there
Just so I could stare at you

To remember your face

by Hilary D'Elia

Is God Freaking Out?

What happened to not worrying? What happened to not living in fear? It seems that most people I know have abandoned ship and dived right into the swirling waters of Fear & Worry.

I'll admit I've teetered on the edge of the boat, filled with trepidation as I contemplate my decision - will I join the others in the icy cold waters, or stay in the safety of His Mercy Ship?

No one wants to die. Not one of us. And no one wants to lose a loved one. No one. So with the whole H1N1 'pandemic' I totally understand the fear of such possibilities. However, I can't help but ask myself, "Isn't the God who created us, loves us, cares for us, sends ten thousand angels to guide us, isn't He aware of what's going on and is His plan still intact?"

Is God freaking out about the 'swine flu'?

What if I do die from it? What if someone I love dies from it? Would God have dropped the ball? Would we all be condemned to a life of misery and heartache?

Maybe, just maybe, He is still in control. Maybe He knows exactly how we feel - vulnerable, scared, unsure, stressed out even. Maybe He's waiting for you to come to Him, right now and tell Him your worries and fears. He'll calm, He'll reassure, He'll surround you with His everlasting light and love.

Believe it. Grab onto the life preserver called Faith...

The Silence of God

Silence. The silence of God. The silence of God when you need to hear His voice the most.

How can He leave me here, withdraw His presence? How can He not call out to me in the midst of my most painful trials? The silence of God is silent. His silence is torturous. His silence stings the soul.

Did Christ on the cross experience the silence of His Father? I'd like to know. I think maybe, just maybe, He did. Jesus is able to sympathize with my most desperate moments on this earth.

When the Father is silent His Word speaks to us. His Word is our comfort when we can't hear His still, quiet voice in our hearts. My Father, my silent Lover, spoke to me today. He broke His silence with His Word. And it was sweet, and it was refreshing, and it was all I ever needed. Thank You my Quiet Salvager.

O Joyful Joy

Thoughts on an ordinary day...

Peace poured out on me and joy. Joyful joy all around me.
It's because of Him. It's all because He loves me.
I have a future because of Him. I have hope. I have love.
Painful pain still shows up, but not like before.
I have Him.
Life is bittersweet. One minute you're savoring it, the
next you're spitting it out of your mouth.
O How He Loves Us!

"I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you
on the palms of My Hands." Isaiah 49:15-16(NIV)

O Painful Pain: a poem for His Broken

O painful Pain you teach me well,
Bringing me down to the depths of hell.

Scrounging around on the bottom of it,
Grasping and searching to escape this shit.

O searing thorn driven through my flesh,
Opening wounds and tightening my chest.

When will it end and let me be,
O God, my Lord, please help me see.

O painful Pain this is only a scratch,
Christ suffered much more on behalf of this wretch.

So onward I go, knowing only too well,
God's ransom's been paid to save me from hell.

by Hilary D'Elia

How can I do this without You?

Loving the template for this blog, thank you hotbliggityblog! Since a head-on collision with Post-Partum Depression (PPD) I cannot fathom getting through my days without God our Father. How could I do this without the One who knit me together and knows all my fears and failures and loves me just the same...

Thank you Father for not caring about what I look like in the morning and seeing me through till I rest my head on my Grandma Mary inspired pillowcase.I can't do this thing called 'life' without Your grace, Your love, Your sustaining power.

Entering blogdom on three, two, one...

Lovestruck, His Broken...